Last Updated on March 8, 2018
It is known that marriages are hard, many people at their wedding day get cold feet and feel gloomy thinking that they are entering a life that will be hard to maintain and impossible to get rid of. But, there are simple habits and things that must be adopted by any married couple in order to enjoy living their own “fairytale”.
A happy marriage is a goal for so many couples who are willing to walk down the aisle anytime soon. That is why we asked experts and we gathered for you some tips that you must know in order to maintain a merry marriage.
make your marriage merrier
1Don’t control your partner
Even though you are sharing a house and a family together, each one of you still has their own life and own character that should not be controlled.
If you asked your partner before to behave in a specific way, then you practiced “external control” as psychologists name it, which is a technique that someone may tend to use in order to earn what they want without considering its effects on others.
Learning how to not control your spouse may be a very long process because it is somehow hard to detect by the person who practices it. In order to maintain it, start with asking yourself if you can control your own behavior before ordering your partner to do the same, remember that you can control only yourself and no one else.
2Take care of yourself
Once you get comfortable with your spouse, taking care of your looks becomes your last priority. But being too comfortable may decrease your confidence and increase your chances of obesity and aging.
By taking care of yourself and following a healthy plan, you will always remain confident in front of your spouse which will increase the chances of your happiness.
However, by taking care of your looks, we don’t mean to always put makeup on (for women) or always trim your beard (for men), it simply means to stay healthy and not abandon your natural habits of looking good to yourself.
Also, don’t forget to take care of your mental side as well; reading a book or two will benefit your brain and your marriage unexpectedly.
“To honor you and to cherish you for better and for worse” this vow must be followed every single day during your married life, it may sound difficult, but it is worth it! By honoring your spouse, you show them how much you love and care for them which is the biggest step towards a happy marriage.
Moreover, it’s normal for problems and conflicts to happen in any relationship, so avoid disrespecting your spouse. Feeling mad or sad is never an excuse to flirt with strangers or co-workers.
By attempting this action, you would create an unnecessary series of pain and unhappiness to your partner and to yourself as well. Respecting your marriage is way easier than dealing with guilt after all!
We all need somebody to hold our hand and listen to us when we need it the most, be that helping hand for your partner whenever they need it and we assure you that they will appreciate you and be there for you every time you need them.
To make your partner even happier, try counseling them and helping them to see their issues from different perspectives. In case helping them is out of your reach, crack a joke that you know they would appreciate, and try to create an environment that could lower the pressure on them and all negative vibes.
Speaking of jokes, happy couples are the ones who are always ready to grasp any fun moment that would help them keep their smiles. You have to always remind each other of how much fun you used to have at the beginning of your relationship that made you fall in love. Make every opportunity a fun experience for both of you.
Also, just because you are married or you have kids, it does not mean you cannot go to amusement parks and challenge each other to ride the big roller coasters or compete in car racing games.
If you want to keep it safer, try going to theaters and ballets performances, and in case it is cold outside, prepare some buttery popcorn and play a comedy movie and enjoy laughing while snuggling together.
The harsh words that you may use during an argument may affect your partner’s feelings and be unforgettable, even if you apologized afterward. If the arguments became hard to solve, take a time out and cool it off, and remind yourself that you vowed to not hurt that person in front of all their family and friends.
While fighting, it is easier for people to act on their emotions and mostly end up “take it out” on each other. In order to maintain a happy marriage, the couple should learn to do the opposite and not act upon their feelings and not attempt to solve the problem while they are still emotional. Plus, always learn how to compromise. Happy marriages are always built on compromising!
The physical intimation is a basic human need, but when the children arrive, it becomes a hard task to keep a healthy physical relationship because, as psychologists say “women are always tired and men can’t stop thinking about it” which causes a damage to the marriage institution. This is why each one should be mindful of the other’s need.
It’s necessary to always consider the physical intimation as a priority in order for the couple to stay happy, healthy, and satisfied. And meeting the need of your partner is the key to keep them feeling loved and desired.
So to keep s*x on your to-do list, break the routine and try to “spice it up” by using new techniques or methods, and most importantly, always communicate!
Empathy means to put oneself in another person’s shoes in order to understand their perspective and get a major understanding of how they feel. By developing empathy, you will help your marriage to be successful tremendously.
It is a process to understand people’s feelings while being aware that these feelings are owned by them and cannot be controlled. When you develop empathy, you will understand that your spouse’s feelings are somewhat different than yours especially when it comes to dealing with anger, rage, and sadness.
In that case, you will earn the ability to be more effective in positively changing and fixing your marriage and thus living happily ever after.