8 Signs You’re The Selfish Partner In Your Relationship

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8 Signs You’re The Selfish Partner In Your Relationship
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Last Updated on December 9, 2020

People tend to be selfish in their relationships sometimes, and that goes for every type of relationship, whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, or even in relationships between family members.

And if you are aware of those moments, acknowledge them and make the necessary changes, then you are on the path to a healthy relationship.

However, if those signs of selfishness are more and more frequent to the point where there is a toxicity pattern, that means you need to make some changes.

It’s easier to notice these unhealthy patterns in romantic relationships because you spend a lot of time with your partner. Everyone experiences relationship problems, but if you can’t identify toxic behaviors in your partner, maybe you are the one to blame.

This article will explore eight signs that you are the toxic person in your relationship, so you can detect them and learn how to stop being selfish and build a successful relationship.

1. They listen to You, But You Don’t Listen To Them

One of the many great things about being in a relationship is the fact that your partner provides you with emotional support – they will listen to your every story, every trouble, and every frustrating thing going on with you.

But if when they are trying to expose their problems, you don’t reciprocate and do the same for them, this means you are selfish. You expect them to do it for you, but you don’t intend to offer them the same amount of consideration.

2. Instead Of Discussing Difficult Topics, You Choose The Silent Treatment

Avoiding communication whenever there is the elephant in the room does nothing for your relationship except damaging it. Your refusal to engage in conversation can result in a lot of stress for your partner.

If you want long term relationship with the person you have by your side, healthy and open communication is the only way to go – it shows emotional maturity and concern about solving your problems.

3. You Always Want To Be Right

Trying always to validate your point above everything else is probably one of the biggest signs of selfishness in a relationship. If you often find yourself trying to be the one that’s right instead of trying to listen to your partner and re-evaluate your opinion, change your ways.

This is an attitude that will set you up for failure because it shows that your only point in this relationship is to meet your needs, without showing any consideration for your partner.

4. You Accuse Your Partner Of Being The Selfish One

You might find yourself accusing your partner of being selfish, but if you take a step back, are you right about this?

Maybe you have selfish preferences and standards, and possibly your partner doesn’t live by your preferences and standards, and for that, you accuse them of being selfish – but in the end, aren’t you the selfish one?

A happy relationship demands that you both compromise and try to meet each other halfway because if one of you has to compromise to make the other content, the relationship will fall apart eventually.

5. You Get Mad If Your Partner Doesn’t Involve You In Their Plans

Respect in a relationship is everything, and this means you need to respect your partner enough to let them have their own life outside the relationship without continually trying to be included in their plans.

A balance between time alone and time together must be achieved if you want to thrive both as individuals and as a couple.

6. You Judge Their Friends And Family

It is not up to you to decide with who your partner gets to hang out with. You have every right to dislike some people, but if you are too judgmental with their friends and family, this is a hard sign of selfishness and control that can get close to emotional abuse.

Humans are social creatures and need more than one emotional connection. If your partner likes someone and you don’t, that’s fine, but don’t belittle them or exhibit passive-aggressive behaviors in their presence, because, with time, this will affect your romantic connection.

7. You Don’t Care About Your Partner’s Needs

A healthy relationship is supposed to compliment your life and to make it better, and if you seek that, you must also provide the same effort in return.

However, if you feel pleased with your relationship but make zero efforts to make sure that your partner is pleased as well, this means you are the selfish one.

Relationships are about getting, but they must also be about giving. Listen to your partner when they communicate their needs and try to accommodate their desires. If they have already told you they feel neglected by some of your actions, you need to try to treat your partner better.

8. You Threaten To End The Relationship Every Time You Don’t Get What You Want

This is manipulative, emotionally abusive, and downright wrong, and if you do this, you might as well end the relationship once and for all and get your head in order.

Threatening to leave someone just because you are not getting what you want is not only immature, but it is also toxic and hurtful to your partner.

If you feel at ease doing this to someone you allegedly love, you are a toxic person, and you need to work on yourself and your ways before trying to share your life with someone else.

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